What is Schizoaffective Disorder?

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Photo by Marc-Olivier Jodoin on Unsplash


You probably have heard of the mental health conditions bipolar and schizophrenia as well as depression, anxiety, and OCD. You may not have heard of schizoaffective disorder, or if you have you may not know much about it, it’s not one of the mental health disorders that gets talked about too much.

According to the Mayo Clinic “schizoaffective disorder is a mental health disorder that is marked by a combination of schizophrenia symptoms, such as hallucinations or delusions, and mood disorder symptoms, such as depression or mania”.

There are two types of schizoaffective disorder

  • Bipolar type- includes instances of mania and possibly major depression as well as schizophrenia symptoms
  • Depressive type- symptoms of major depression as well as schizophrenia symptoms no instances of mania

The clinic I go to has labeled me as schizoaffective depressive type although when I was younger I did have many instances of the bipolar type. When I’ve gone through a schizoaffective episode in the past I had delusions, paranoia, and mania. 

Delusions

With the delusions I would have very strong beliefs of things that weren’t true and I would create scenarios in my head that I firmly believed were true. Many of these scenarios I created were outlandish and ridiculous but I firmly believed them. For instance while in a psychiatric hospital I was reading a calendar they had on the wall and it said the day was John the Baptist day, I then believed I was John the Baptist and people were going to celebrate by chopping my head off. I freaked out crying and yelling I was terrified I really believed I would be beheaded like John was. Thankfully a nurse came to me and talked to me and got me to calm down. 

Paranoia

With the paranoia I will find it difficult to be in large crowds, I have thought everyone is staring at me, whispering about me, plotting to hurt me. Also with the paranoia I have thought I was being followed or watched. I’ve thought I was being poisoned as well I think that is part delusion part paranoia. Once, while at the emergency room of a hospital, I thought everyone was staring at me and I literally yelled, “Stop staring at me, stop fucking staring at me!”

Mania

When I have been in a manic episode I’ve talked so fast I couldn’t get my words out. I’ve stayed up for days at a time jumping from project to project not being able to focus. I’ve become hyper-sexual, sleeping with multiple partners who I barely new. I’ve gone on huge shopping sprees without concern for the consequences. 

Depression

I also get depression with the schizoaffective. I will go for days without a shower or brushing my teeth. I will not want to leave the house or be around people. I will feel worthless and hopeless. I think about taking my life and have attempted to in the past.

Treatment

Treatment for me includes getting a bimonthly injection of an antipsychotic medication called Risperdal Consta and taking the antidepressant Lexapro. The Risperdal quite literally saved my life. It got me out of a year long psychosis and gave my family back to me that I had lost for the year I was sick with the schizoaffective. It gave me my mind back. 

I also meet with a nurse every 2 weeks and a psychiatrist every month to every 3 months depending on how I’m doing.

I stay very aware of my thoughts and feelings and when I notice something isn’t right I will tell my husband as well as talk to the nurse at the clinic I go to.

The schizoaffective will be something I will have to deal with my entire life, it’s not something that will ever go away but it can be kept in check as long as I do my part by continuing my medication and going to all my doctors appointments and keeping aware of my thoughts and moods.

I consider myself very fortunate that I was able to get on a medication that works for me. For 20 years I had lived a difficult life going in and out of hospitals and in and out of psychosis’. Losing so much, hurting those I cared about most, including myself. For the last 15 years, since getting on the right medication, accepting this illness, and taking responsibility for it, I have had a very good life. I am married, have a daughter who will be graduating high school this year, a rambunctious dog, and a place to call home. I have hobbies and interests and work at bettering myself. 

I hope this article gives you a better understanding of what schizoaffective disorder is and how it affects those living with it. 

If you are struggling with an untreated illness of your own reach out for help, you don’t have to do this alone. 

The Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24/7 1–800–273–8255.


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